Tuesday, 31 January 2012

Sunday, 29 January 2012

fighting, fucking, but mostly fighting

Oh hello, you'll have to excuse my neglect of you for almost twenty four hours, my beloved two current followers (by the way you two, wasn't dinner lovely tonight?) I have taken the liberty of using an exotic coloured font to excite you into forgiveness, astonish and admonish your rage away.

But I've been out, drinking, being crude you could say, and it put me in mind of some work..well..I don't know if the DWP or indeed any governmental body would apply the term 'work'..some drawings for a magazine in Newcastle run by some shitbeaks in North Shields who totally spunk over Primus.  They're nice guys. It's called Turps, and here's some stuff we used to do for it.

If this kind of crude sarcastic rubbish tickles your fancy there's more in the same vein on the goldentruncheons flickr link, which comes with the added stamp of dissaproval from the London 2012 Olympic commitee! Including, personally, the keyboardist out of Heaven 17. Yes, EVERYBODY thinks we're rubbish. May I just now take this opportunity to point out how crap The Independent is? Thanks.

Saturday, 28 January 2012

aren't people srange

Aren't people strange, huh? Aren't they QUEER! Oh? what's that? you think they are? I do too actually.  And, I've found the queerest cross section can be found in respectable newspapers, whose employees wear pinstripe, and then the sort of newspapers which ram themselves uninvited through your grey, provinchial letter box of your shit house on your miserable damp estate, every single fortnight for the rest of your shit boring life, the osrt of newspapers which just seem so much more YOU and remind you of everything that has been and is to come. I HATE The News Guardian. The News Guardian is basically a mouthpiece for Northumbria Police and Linda Arkley, an old tory hoor whose job appears to be going to roundabouts / potholes / fences / sports fields / flower beds / leisure centers and posing for a photograph in The News Guardian. "4 New Jobs created at Morrissons",  "Eggselent", "Snow-going-back" "The 'Writing's on the wall' for [INSERT]", "You'll have to mend ways, Man told" ETCETERA ETCETERA... unfortunately one of my fave articles has disappeared :


I invite you to use that link to find out what's going on in Tyneside yourself, I'm afriad you have missed a recent event covered at Collingwoods monunment, which "Almost a Dozen" people attended.

The News Guardian was a frequent feature in an a series of paintings (sort of) which did attempt to cataclysmize such mundanity by collecting it and sticking it together in M&W's (that's us, btw) never ending shit-storm of enormous, heavy bits of art, called 'Shopicals' which, like one's altzhiemic parents, you know will be a worrysome and heavy burden and will probably get thrown in the Thames by 2013..Actually, they will be donated to local Newspapers nationwide, if anyone has any nominations of deserving titles. Some pictures of the Shopicals will be online soon. In the mean time, give one of these poor buggers some luv.
Photos;NG, Words;Telegraph

Riding it out

Hello. I am Ellen Wood, DOB JUL1989, OV Shields.
You may not know me, but you soon will. I am a devastatingly good looking artistic and musical genius, with a impressive range of general knowledge. I have a smattering of outputs all over the internet so I thought I'd get them all together on here in a more comprehensive manner.

The past few years at University, studying anthropology of flipping worthless and depressing knowledge into the air and trying to catch it in my mouth, have rather gotten in the way of organizing real work - enjoyable things like writing and drawing and filming people without their knowledge, transporting them to a universe of pretense. So there will be bits and bobs of old things on here, but mostly current updated stuff. I like to use film and make sure everything I make looks like it predates 1995 at least. Why, I do not know.

I  do a lot of work with my colleague M. Silcox, one might call it the great work, as we are, very charitably trying to improve the world for the better via means of subterfuge that I am not able to fully disclose currently. We also draw cocks a lot and sometimes other things but not as often and we go to the pub like every single night and have chips for our tea like every single day, alternating on condiments. I like working with other film makers, and musicians and stuff lots and lots so do get in touch if you think you're hard enough.
That's all, ciaow, here's a few holiday snaps just to get things under way, most things in these photographs have changed considerably.
And here's a little music to tide you over. I hope you like it, but I don't care